nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
Randomize
