is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
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