I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
