hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Randomize