fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Randomize
