You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
