in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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