they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
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