Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
I feel like people expect me to always be a sarcastic, shade throwing drunk. And you know me, I hate to disappoint.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
