dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
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