she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
I wish they made helmets for livers.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
