I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
Randomize
