As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
Randomize
