I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
Randomize
