i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
