Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
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