time to smoke my breakfast
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
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