You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
