We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
It's rum buckets o'clock
I just referred to our excessive fireball consumption as a team building exercise and everyone in group text agreed.
We're not alcoholics, we're a god damn team.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
