Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
