do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
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