HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
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