I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Randomize
