Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
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