I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
Is Oprah even human
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
Randomize
