My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
Randomize