I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Randomize
