Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
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