What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
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