nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
operation have a gay friend backfired
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
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