batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
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