...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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