i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
Sitting in airport bathroom. Guy walks into toilet next to me and announces "I want to apologize to the entire airport for what I'm about to do"
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
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