Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
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