my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
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