After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
Randomize
