have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
The bartender told me the best pick-up line was to look deep into her eyes and tell her your gonna flick her vagina
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
Randomize
