hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
