Your face is a jimmy john
I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
Randomize
