Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Randomize
