is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
Randomize