Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
Randomize
