He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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