Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
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