oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
