I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
Randomize
