So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
Randomize
