Sponge bath it is.
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
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