is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
Randomize
