Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
She announced her abortion via fbk
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
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