my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize
